Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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