I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
