Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize