About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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