she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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