I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
