Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
