I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize