plz talk dirty to me
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Then you guys just all showered together...?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
