party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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