If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
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