these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
