So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
