Umm I'm too high to move.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
