Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Found your dick twin last night
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
