omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
