apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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