I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
