i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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