Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Too much gin, very little bucket
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize