i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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