It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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