yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
