We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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