Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
