Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
i think my cat just said my name.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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