Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
