Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
