i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
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