apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
The feeling are messing with the penis
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
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