when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Can you bring me the toilet please
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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