when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
