Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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