Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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