You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize