We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
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