I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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