Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
