p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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