wat bout pragnant strippers??
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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