So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
