My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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