It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I got inside last night via doggy door
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
