Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize