dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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