Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
