I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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