I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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