It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
