I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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