It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
The adults are the big ones right?
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