their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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