I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
